Oneyear.

Omg! It was amazing, we went shopping like all day and then he took me to a hotel, and it was the most magical night of my life, I couldn't believe he'd done thatt for me. I don't know how I can make it up to him, it really was something amazing for him to do.

Its late and I just wanted to say it went great and that I'm truely happy to be with him :). Lostintrasmission. x

ourdaysarenumbered.

Okay so like my mum has been sick for a while, and its like I've tried to help here and there but sometimes its too much, like I've got school and other worries, but it feels like I'm her attack of the world at the moment, and its pissing me off. Like its understandable that she be pissed off and all that, but like I've got 2 tests next week and I have to prepare a decent speech all for school and its like I've got other worries at the same time avoiding just school.

But today is not about that, its about blocking what is stressing me out and relaxing, today is the weekend marking my one year anaversery with my boyfriend, were going out for the day and night. And I'm going to enjoy myself, well I hope I do. But I guess it will all play out how it does, but ill tell you all when I know.

Lostintrasmission. x

Andaoneo'clocktwoo'clockrock

Hmmmm, today. Well today was alright, it was mufti at school, and surprise surprise, people took what you wore as a status symbol. I have learnt that there's not much you can do to avoid what people think, so I went simple today, a black top, black jeans and my black chucks and all I got was why are you in all black? Which kept me happy because I didn't get anyone looking down there nose at what I was wearing.

But then there was my friend kelly, so was in the shortest skirt you could find, and heels that were way to high for school. And its like she does something like this everytime and its gets to me, like yeah, she's hot, but come on she's got a boyfriend and everything but she still goes prancing around like she couldn't careless. And it gets to me you know? Like how could someone be such a whore to not care about self respect and all that stuff.

But then she turns around and she's starts lying to me which gets me thinking coz I've got friends that tell the truth but tell the world your secrets, and it makes me wonder if someone who lies but keeps secrets is better then someone who tells the truth but lets everyone know everything. It really seems somewhat retard that I have to deal with both these friends in such a form because really they can be nice when there not lying and telling the world other peoples secrets.

And now, mums gone out for some drinks and I'm stuck here watching a bunch of little Retards that can't do what they're told. So I'm off to deal with them. Bye all.

life

hello hello all, just relised I havn't really introduced myself just really been having a bit of a bitch, well, I'm heather from sydney, I live in the inner west like 20 minutes from the city and I swear its like the most awesome thing ever,ignoring the fact that as soon as I can I want to move away from here, but i guess thtas a completely different story, I aim to do something with radio or tv production, I'm in year 11 and I swear its killing my life, I thought I was choicing alright subjects and like now its like OMFG I hate half of them, its like you know when you get this idea in your head about what somethings going to be like? well thats exactly what happended to me. I was all yeah this'll be cool, history will be like last year, math will be a bludge, entertainment will be mad, bleh bleh bleh, couldn't be more wrong.

Like I like entertainment, its fun I've met new people and stuff and its teaching me stuff I will probably want to know, but on the other hand its got me thinking that maybe I should have kept up with the whole doing a year of radio production basics and a year of tv basics, but everyone talked me out of it and like I'm slowly starting to regret it, but I guess theres not much I can really do.

And with history, last year I though it was a pain but I liked it, it was interesting, something different, something I could somehow relate to, but like now its all different, its confusing the fuck outta me. and its like the same with Math, last year it pissed me off, but like I'm awesome with it, and now its like arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I want to seriously pull me hair out.

But I guess its all about living with things I guess. But yeah, back to about me, I'm nothing overly interesting really, just an over the top average school girl who wants to get away. I seriously think that most of the people I know are back stabbing two faced whores, but I live with them, more like atempt my hardest to put up with them. Adn half the time I feel like turing around to them and telling them to get the fuck overthemselves and too grow the fuck up, but then again, theres not much I can do about all that really.

I am slowly becomming more and more lazy with not really bothering about most things, and not really bothering with worrying about what the rest of society thinks of me, it strains too much on my mental health. I have recently fallen in love with a man who not many people agreed with me doing so, we fight on occassions, but we seem to make it though most of the bullshit thta peopel chuck at us, and he can seriously be the biggest pain in the arse from time to time, but its like I know his only doing to look after me and protect me in his own special twisted way, and thats kinda why I love him.

I have the normal family from what most people would say, you know, mum, dad, two sisters and a brother, the people you know you can depend on if you need something, as much as tye piss me off I love them, because I know that no matter which family I'm with, the people in it are generally going to find a way to piss you off.

I think thats kinda all for now, so I'm off.

lostintransmission. x

wemakeupjustsowecanbrakeup

rawr, okay so like sometimes it does feel like things only happen so that it can then fall apart, if you think about it, it is somewhat true. Two weeks ago it all fell apart and a day later it was perfect again and it happened again on friday, so I went to the party and he didn't come and ignored me for like the entire day until about 5 minutes before I was going to leave, he tried to start a fight but it didn't work, and just put my phone away and ignored it, but when i went and checked it later on he was going on saying that I was drinking and shit and trying to make it seem like I was cheating on him which pissed me off emencly and we ended up fighting over it and by the end of it all I told him it was over, and he just took it and didn't say anything about it.

And then comes a long saturday morning and he's ringing me up at 8 in the morning wanting to talk, so I go after everything I did it was the least I could do, and we sat not talking for almost and hour and then he turns around is telling me that it could never work again and all random stuff and I was like fine, like seriously what else was I going to, admit defeat right in front of him? I dont think so. So on he went and then we turns around and his like I'm hungry and he invites me over to eat, and its WTF? after saying it could never work again his doing this? He was seriously confusing thw fuck out of me, but I went, I wasn't about to let it fall apart compelety, but I told myself I wouldn't fight which I didn't do, but though out the day wierd things happen, he was saying stuff like I wasn't his girlfriend one minute but the next saying that he wanted me as his wife the next, so I went with it.

And then by the end of day it all seemed somewhat back on track, and we were happy again, but in the past two days from that things have changed, not from the happiness, or things becomming bad, but it all seems somewhat more romantic. Something I don't think either of us have seen in a while, and it had been nice. But it has got me thinking about how much longer its going to last, like what happens if I want to go out again and he acts the way he did again? or what if we have some fight that kills us both. It really does have me thinking, but then again all I can do is hope for the best.

letsallgoforaparty

okay, so like tomorrow night this friend of mine is having her 16th birthday party, straight up you can figure out what its gonna be like, but avoiding all commen thoughts on the idea i reckon its going to be quite alright, dinner in the city, koroke, then hang out in darling habour (which I'm most likly going to skip). I have no problems with these plans neither does my mother, but then comes along my bf, straight out I ask him if he'd like to come he goes on making up excuses like, oh I dont know anyone, there not my age, I dont get along with them. . . blah blah blah. And its not like this is first time his done it, a few months ago I went out with a bunch of people I worked with I asked him to come his like nah you go, so I go out, next thing I know his going on how i shouldn't have gone out and shit, which I went along with for a few days then got the shits with him and it started a huge fight. And its like I dont want that happening again so I invite him, I try and get him into comming but it doesn't work but his like its fine you go, then yesterday I go over and his like I dont want you to go, and its like huh? and then he starts going on that there is going to be guys there that he doesnt know and shit, and its like and what? we've been going out for almost a year now and he seriously has this idea in his head that I'm going to cheat, its like yeah okay think that if you want but you've got no right to, I have never given him the idea that I would do something like that and when I ask him why his got such a crazy idea in his head he turns around and says "I trust you I just don't trust them" its like seriously how much more of a idoit can you become. Anywho the pysco librarian is going on so I'm off, cya.